Saturday, April 18, 2009

Omegle - tonnes of fun

Last night, I stumbled upon a website called Omegle.
Basically, it allows two random strangers to chat with one another.


Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: hi
Stranger: u ok
You: asl
Stranger: 30 m liverpool
You: ooooh sexy
Stranger: u
You: 54 m Pakistan
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: huohuo~
You: hi
Stranger: i come here the first time ~
You: yea im new to the internet too
You: is this google
You: can i search from here
You: how can i send an email
Stranger: what `s meaning?
You: am i on the internet
Stranger: send an email?
You: is this facebook
Stranger: yes ~
Stranger: no ~
You: im new to this
Stranger: me too
You: this is my first time on a computer
You: how do i send an email
You: is this google
You: how do i search
You: can i book one way tickets from here
Stranger: no ~you can`t
You: i thought this was the internet
Stranger: it juat a page you can talk with the stranger
You: do i give you my credit card details?
Stranger: no ~haha
You: how do i book for tickets then
You: the internet is a lot harder than i thought
You: is this facebook
Stranger: no ~
You: then what is this
You: i thought i was on the internet
You: or is it called the world wide web
Stranger: how old are you ?why you the first tough the internet?
Stranger: http://omegle.com/
Stranger: this is the page~
You: Oh
You: So I can only book train tickets here?
Stranger: how did you come here?
You: Or am I thinking of a different Omegle
You: I found a computer open
You: And this was on
You: I asked the women in the cafe to help me but she ignored me
Stranger: no ~~~~~it just a page that you can chat~
You: So now here I am trying to book online tickets with you
You: Does your airline cover accommodation?
Stranger: ~but I cannot help you~
You: Why I have all my personal details with me and I have a credit card
Stranger: yes ~but i am in china~
You: Why can I not book a ticket
You: Do China's airlines offer good prices?
Stranger: i don`t know~if it offer ,how can u book it?
You: i thought this was the internet
You: why arent you taking my booking
Stranger: yes it is
You: i will ring your manager
Stranger: i don`t want to talk to you again~88
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hola!
You: ola
Stranger: como estas?
You: What
Stranger: FUCK YOU YOU AMERICAN!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hellier
You: Greetings dear sir or madam.
Stranger: Sir it is =]
You: I have a business proposition for you.
Stranger: Oh yes?
You: My father, a Kenyan prince, was killed not so long ago. Before he died, he left over 5 million dollars and three wives in a bank account.
You: The three wives have no doubtfully starved to death but there's reason to believe that the money is still ok.
Connection imploded.


Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: oi!
You: oi!
You: asl?
Stranger: 20/m/usa
Stranger: u ?
You: 57 M Bangladesh
You: Wanna cyber?
Stranger: dayum get the fuck off you faggot
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
Stranger: where are you from
?
You: hi
You: where are you from
?
Stranger: hi
Stranger: where are you from
Stranger: ?
You: hi
You: where are you from
You: ?
Stranger: hi
Stranger: where are you from
Stranger: ?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi any girl who want to talk?
You: asl
Stranger: 24/m/ india
Stranger: u?
You: 14/f/usa
Stranger: want to talk about sex?
Stranger: ?
You: You sick fuck.
You have disconnected.

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: Hello, I have come here today to talk to you about Allah.
Stranger: thats okay
Stranger: what else do u wanna talk about
You: Allah.
Stranger: u can get ALLAH deese nuts!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


I ask anyone reading this to try it out for themselves and post the resulting chat log here. The sicker/funnier/whatever the better.

3 comments:

  1. im gonna try this when i get home, they dont let me have fun in work!

    ReplyDelete
  2. You see, that's the problem with being employed.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Here's the first conversation I had:

    Connecting to server...
    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
    Stranger: hello
    You: What species are you?
    Stranger: im a quadraduck
    You: Ah, the most edible of all the numeroid-duckly beings.
    Stranger: but im counted as a ornithorenk
    Stranger: water familia
    You: Those are also tasty.
    You: Do you ever swim in gravy?
    Stranger: they don't allow me to
    Stranger: they said the pool was closed
    You: Perhaps they were species-ist.
    You: Perhaps they didn't like your swimming costume.
    Stranger: yes they were
    You: I think you look sexy in your swimming costume.
    Stranger: thx
    You: And your slippery gravy soaked feathers.
    You: uuuuuuuuuhhhhh
    Stranger: they told me i will be experimented on
    You: Are you a lady ornithornek?
    Stranger: i don't hane a gender
    Stranger: quadraducks self-fertilize
    You: Go fuck yourself then.
    Stranger: yeah thats right
    Stranger: i fuck myself
    You: Do you have to use contraception?
    Stranger: no
    Stranger: i cant hold it with my ducky hands
    You: That's unfortunate.
    You: So you have many little birdy babies.
    Stranger: i do
    You: All who choke the chicken as much as you do.
    You: Can I eat your babies?
    Stranger: NOOOO !
    Stranger: u sick twisted man
    You: I already ate some.
    Stranger: WTF !?
    You: They cried and asked where you were.
    Stranger: oh i was fucking your wife
    You: Mommy, mommy, they cried!
    Stranger: Duck ! Duck she screamed
    Stranger: while i was filling her anus with my duckly sperm
    You: Or daddy daddy! They were a little confused to be honest.
    You: She never lets me fill her anus with my duckly sperm.
    Stranger: Or daddy daddy!said ur wife...no confusion at all
    Stranger: wait...w-what ?
    Stranger: ur...ur a duck ?
    You: Yes, a canibal duck.
    Stranger: from which family
    You: The flapanogids.
    Stranger: oh...u came from jupiter then
    Stranger: u know hank the flamingo ?
    You: Hank? I hunt baby seals with Hank on the weekends!
    Stranger: oh wow
    Stranger: he's an old friend of mine
    You: I'm slowly posioning him in the hope I'll never have to give back his lawn-mower. Don't tell anyone.
    Stranger: u cant
    You: I gots to.
    Stranger: hank is a spodra
    Stranger: they are immune to poison
    You: I was wondering why it was taking him so long to bleed out his intestines.
    You: Hey, you got aids by any chance?
    Stranger: nope
    Stranger: but malaria
    You: You think my wife might have caught it from you?
    Stranger: i think just otherwise
    You: Damn.
    Stranger: ....wait
    Stranger: how come you didn't get malaria
    You: I'm a Loonben.
    You: Immune to anything mosquitos carry.
    Stranger: oh
    Stranger: it figures
    You: Anyways, I have to go kill Hank and my wife and your children.
    Stranger: well good luck
    You: Catch you and eat you later.
    Stranger: but i gotta warn you
    Stranger: when my experiment finishes,
    Stranger: i will be duckzilla
    Stranger: and i will find you
    Stranger: and destroy
    Stranger: you
    Stranger: just a heads up
    You: Geez. Nasty.

    ReplyDelete